Little Dreams - big God

I considered it to be the death of a dream. After 12 years of ministry, 12 years of prayer, tears, joy, and labor, it was all over - Gilead Retreat and Counseling Center was no more. We had sold the entire facility just the day before. No more mowing 15 acres; no more cleaning and maintaining 24 sinks, 18 commodes, 13 showers and four urinals; no more huge utility bills nor many thousands of dollars for insurance and property taxes each year; no more cooking meals for conference attendees nor washing load after load after load of dishes after each meal. Those were fleeting thoughts but the thought that truly seemed to be the dream killer kept returning - NO MORE MINISTRY, NO MORE CALL.

That’s how I felt some years ago as we hosted our last conference at the retreat facility we had poured our lives into for all those years. I sat quietly and listened as a great warrior for Christ, an itinerant evangelist who has been on the battlefield for over 60 years, began to speak. His audience was a group of about 70 men, most of whom were young and many who were called to become pastors. Suddenly it dawned on me - the dream had not died! In fact, it had been fulfilled in ways we could never have imagined. I could never have dreamed that 70 men at one time would be trained and encouraged to"Drop to the ground and die in order that your congregations might find Life." I could never have dreamed that so many young pastors at one time would be taught to pursue holiness, to live in the power of the Holy Spirit and fire, and to set their hearts toward longing and praying for true national revival. I could have never dreamed that our own souls would be so lovingly nurtured during those years nor that we would be given the privileges of walking alongside so many hurting people. I realized then that my dream wasn’t dead - it had just been far too small!

Our great Father, in wondrous kindness, gave Deborah and me much over which to rejoice in those days. Yes, Gilead was gone but the dream was not. The setting for ministry would be different but the call would be the same. The opportunities for ministry would be greater than ever as we became more and more directly involved in the lives of hurting people.

We look back now and see that, as always, God was orchestrating these things for our good and His glory. Now we are involved in the lives of many couples as we, as a couple, provide both pre-marital and marital counseling to other couples. Now we have more opportunity than ever, both individually and as a couple, to provide Biblical insight and help to those struggling with grief, depression, family struggles, addictions and other issues. Most of all, we now have new opportunities daily to point all who come our way to the absolute sufficiency of Christ.

I now realize that the ministry to which we are called isn’t really a dream anyway. It has been and continues to be a real call by our good God for His own glory. It was never about Gilead, never about us, nor even ever about those to whom we minister. It is about Him; it is through Him; it is for His glory. Glory to God in the highest!