Who Do We Blame?

During the years I worked as a forester I always carried a pocket knife with me. Most of those years I carried it in my back pocket. Eventually, that knife would wear a hole in the pocket.

One day my wife, Deborah, asked "Why do you always wear a hole in the back pocket of your work pants?" I replied "Because that's where I carry my knife". "I never heard of anyone carrying a knife in the back pocket", she said. "Why do you do that?" Without a thought I replied "Because that's where daddy carried his knife".

It was years later, only after we had begun counseling and had heard many answers to the question "Why do or why did you do that?" that I recalled the conversation Deborah and I had about the knife. How quickly and easily we blame others!

"Why did you have an affair?"

"Because my spouse ..."

"Why do you abuse your wife?"

"Because my dad abused his wife."

"Why do you struggle with addictions?"

"Because my parents were alcoholics."

"Why this? Why that? Why the other?"

"Because of something someone else did. It's really not my fault."

From where do such silly answers and such quick disowning of our sins come? We only have to look at the Book of Genesis to find out. In Genesis 3 God asked Adam if he had disobeyed. Adam's response to God was "The woman whom You gave to be with me, she gave me of the tree and I ate." In other words, "Yes, I sinned, God, but it was first of all the fault of my wife and ultimately it was Your fault!! If you hadn't given her to me I wouldn't have been tempted and had I not been tempted I would not have sinned." Man's shifting of blame started that day and continues even now.

Do the past hurts in our lives affect us? Absolutely. Do the patterns we saw in our parents influence us? Without a doubt. Do the sinful choices of other people tempt us? Over and over. Are any of these things so great that they overwhelm the power of the Holy Spirit to "keep you from stumbling" (Jude 24). No! It will never be.

I still carry a pocket knife but I carry it in my front pocket now. Why? Because I realized that I wasn't bound to do something which ruined my pant pocket just because that is what I had learned from my daddy. That is really a trite matter when compared to the hard struggles with sin which we are so prone to blame on someone else. Even so, the principle is the same. So, as you struggle with your own past or as you help others who do, the Word of God for the real Christian is that "we are made more than conquerors through Him who loved us" (Romans 8:37). Run hard to Him. Hide those sins, remove them forever, in the blood of Christ. Be bound to them no more.